Just recently I was blessed with an opportunity that I honestly never thought I had a chance at. It wasn’t that I didn’t believe I had the chops for it, it was more about what I thought I needed to make it happen. I felt like if I wasn’t doing everything in the perfect order, or if I wasn’t using what everyone else was using I, in turn, wouldn’t get the opportunity. I was proved VERY wrong!
There is something to say about breaking the rules. I have found that in my life, not following the rules to a “T” (at the appropriate time of course) has paid off. We all grow up being expected to follow certain rules, and of course, I teach my children the same but as we grow older I have learned over time that these rules we have been following are often self-inflicted or non-existent. As a result of following all of these crazy rules, it can be easy to fall into a trap of never breaking the mold or not following our hearts in an effort to be these perfect, rule-abiding citizens.
Living Rule Free as an Individual
Living under the pressure of unspoken, unenforced rules for your life, that you didn’t even create can take a lot out of you. Toss these rules to the wayside and follow your heart! How much more gratifying could life be if you are living for you rather than to meet the expectations of the guidelines placed on you by society. Follow your heart and do the things that matter to you — the things that reflect your own personality, strengths, and interests ultimately make you happier and offer more opportunities to do more of just that.
Living Rule Free as A Wife (in a relationship)
I have literally followed none of the societal norms when it comes to my relationship with my husband. He is my very best friend and as besties do, we’ve been breaking the rules from the moment we met.
We lived together and had a child before we were married, we chose to forego a wedding went to the courthouse and put a down-payment on a house. Some people may frown upon some of the things we’ve done or the order in which we did them but that’s okay because it worked for us. Needless to say, nothing has changed; We haven’t done anything traditionally and probably won’t ever. The pressure of society to do things in a certain timeframe or in a specific order is not what works for every relationship. It’s important to do what works best for you and your significant other. Following society’s expectations could quite frankly ruin the love you have for each other.
At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what is thought about your love, because it’s just that, your love. You build a fortress of your own design and protect each other’s decision to design it in the way that you choose… together.
Living Rule Free as a Parent
You can not come into parenthood without people placing expectations on you. Seriously everyone and their mom has an opinion, I really do mean EVERYONE! You probably have expectations of yourself as well based on how you grew up or the opinions you have fostered seeing other people raise their families. With these expectations comes rules that you will tell yourself you have to follow. The first thing I learned becoming a parent is everything I thought I knew I wanted to do or had strong opinions about before I had gone out the window. There are things my parents did that I do in my home and there are other aspects of my parenting that my mom thinks I am crazy for.
Not every parent will agree with your choices and it’s not realistic to expect them too. Along the way you may change your mind about how you feel about your own style of parenting, that’s completely okay. I owe it to my little ones to do what works for us and that may not always be the popular choice, but that’s okay too! We learn as we go, and staying open to what may not work as well as new ways to do old things never hurt anyone.
Living Rule Free as a Creative
As an entrepreneur, taking risks and breaking rules is apart of my everyday. This is especially true being a creative. Coming up with unique perspectives, new concepts for products and ideas always benefit from breaking the rules.
I feel that you have to believe in breaking the rules as a creative. But not just breaking the rules but knowing when to break them. This weeds out the good from the okay when it comes to innovating and being successful in your “rule-breaking.” I have found that thinking too highly of the rules has led me to be too restricted and doesn’t allow my creativeness to run free and work to my full potential. Alternatively, there will be times that just don’t allow for you to break the rules, so this is when you can “hack” the system and find ways rules and make it easier to create with the weight of regulations and criteria on you.
If you ask permission for everything first or look to “best practice” all of the time, you’ll never get your ideas past the first line of yays and nays. Living rule-free as a creative means thinking outside the box and look for creative solutions. Pushing boundaries and opening other minds to new (sometimes rebellious) possibilities.
True happiness is not dependent on anyone but yourself. You have to make the choice to be happy …
It may be hard to drop the hard-wired rigid expectations and rules we have placed on ourselves that we swear will make us more successful, smart or happier. True happiness is not dependent on anyone but yourself. You have to make the choice to be happy and live in your own choices and decisions. There is no magical order or special way to do any one thing that will make you successful or more right.
With that said, follow your heart, but don’t forget to take your brain with you. Are you living rule-free in any aspect of your life? What rules have you broken lately and what were the outcomes?
